Yesterday I felt particularly homesick - to the point of tears. A lot of things have been going on. I miss home. I miss my brothers. I miss my mom and dad. I miss LEGIT Asian food. I miss my friends. I miss my couch. I miss my church. I miss my church family. I miss him. I miss California weather.

Yesterday was Saturday, and I woke up at around 11 AM and went and got brunch with Vivian, after that, I tried to do homework. Julius and I worked on our English essays (which are still not done) and Vivian worked on reading her novel. We facebook-ed each other while we were in the same room. It was so silly and yet so fun. I have found a new hobby in making Facebook Videos :) so much fun! Then we headed to dinner and got back and did some more work. Oh, and we made a trip to the Salvation Army and I picked out a temporary raincoat just in case it rains again. And we made a trip to the post office so I can drop of my postcards. I checked my PO Box and was kind of sad it was empty.

Then, I decided to really crack down on this essay that is due at 3 PM today (and is still not done as I write this). It's on masculinity and femininity and I'm using an ad from State Farm for analyzing this theme. But then I just went into this "missing home" mode. It was so depressing when mom called two days ago and was in tears because she was worried about me due to Annie Le's case. I really do hope this situation will turn into positive miracle. I pray for her family and, especially her fiance. They were going to get married today. And the investigators have found bloody clothes in her laboratory station, which may or may not be linked to her. I hope, I hope, I hope that she just got cold feet and will show up soon. And then, I read about Kevin Telles' death from playing football. Such a melancholy event, and when it comes to these things, I really don't know what to say. Except that life is so short and sometimes, sometimes it's taken away. He had so much potential. He lived and breathed football and he gave it everything he had on that field. I salute you, Kevin Telles and may you rest in peace. Hopefully, we'll see each other again one day.

Then I started to question why all this is happening. Surely this is not how God wants it to be. Why is there all this hurt and pain? But there's also the other side. There were birthday celebrations and weddings on the same days these events happened. Is this the balance of life? I find it so hard to be so sad and so happy at the same time. It's draining, emotionally.

Well, I also want to congratulate Nate and Anne! Happy wedding, happy marriage, happy ever after! :) And to Brendon and Lindsey as well! :)

Tracee called me yesterday and we had a good talk. Well, it was mostly me venting. Okay, it was me venting the whole time. But I'm glad she called and listened and offered comfort. Thank you so much, Tracee.

Then, I headed out to celebrate with my friends who had their birthdays within this past week. Happy Birthday do all of you! I really needed to get away and have a good time. And I did, so it ended up being a good night. And, Nancy was texting me and said how she wished I was there to eat cupcakes with her and drool over Zac Efron. Haha :) <3>

At the end of my night, which is only the beginning for the other kids who were about to go party, I couldn't help but be a little irked by all the vulgarity around me. Drugs, sex, and alcohol seem to be everywhere. I get it that it's college. I get it that some people need to relieve stress. What I don't get is why girls are willing to dress in clothing up to their butts and giving up their bodies to guys who won't even remember who they are the next day. And then seeing the drunk people do silly things, say silly things, is also particularly awkward and annoying. I don't get why people do the things they do, what kind of satisfaction do they find in doing those things? I don't want to come off as judgmental, I just don't get it.

I went to bed at 2 and got up at 7 and I am now in the Branford Library, determined to get my work done. I'm going to try out Trinity's evening service today at 6:30 with Vivian.

This morning, I read in Matthew Chapter 5. Here are the parts that stood out to me this particular morning:

"Blessed are the poor in spirit , for theirs is the kingdom of heaven"

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted"

"Blessed are the pure of heart, for they will see God"

"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of the me"

"you are the salt of the earth.... You are the light of the world"

"You have heard that it was said, 'love your neighbor and hate your enemies,' But I tell you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven."

Lord, today, please help me be productive and get my work done. Lord, let me miss home, but please don't let me become an emotional wreck. And today, please help me be a light for You. Amen.